1 Timothy 4:13-16 “Until I come, give attention to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation and teaching. Do not neglect the spiritual gift within you, which was bestowed on you through prophetic utterance with the laying on of hands by the presbytery. Take pains with these things; be absorbed in them, so that your progress will be evident to all. Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you.” NASB
I was born in a very religious home. Many have said that they attended church 9 months before they were born; this was certainly true of me. And because of my familiarity with church I quickly learned what was expected of me. At 8 years of age, due to an extreme fear of going to hell, I walked the aisle, asked Jesus into my heart, and was baptized. And for the next 11 years I was the best little Pharisee you ever saw.
I wore Christian T-shirts, I quoted bible verses, I never missed church. At the same time I was a slanderer, a heart-adulterer, and one who loved the sinful lusts of the world. However, because I was so good at playing the church game and fooling those around me, my freshman year in college I was asked to serve as a counselor at a Christian camp. This would prove pivotal.
During one of the services, we were singing the song “Holiness”. The chorus goes like this: “So take my heart and form it, take my mind; transform it, take my will; conform it to Yours, to Yours, oh Lord.” As I sang that song, I began to beg Jesus to do just that. I had been overwhelmed with how far short I really was of what God intended for me to be. There wasn’t just one nagging sin that I was being convicted of, God was revealing to me that I was completely wrong. In other words, I didn’t just need to be “tweaked”, I needed to start from scratch. You might say I needed to die and be born again.
That night I begged Jesus to change me, all along promising Him, that even if I didn’t like the changes He made, that I wanted Him to do it anyway.
Needless to say, I left that worship service different. I couldn’t explain it, but I no longer liked the things I used to like. My passions were different, my desires were different. The old me was gone, and a new me had arrived.
However, it wasn’t until 9 years later that I realized what had happened to me. Hopefully as you read the above paragraphs, you immediately spotted it as salvation. I did not. I had been indoctrinated to believe that praying the sinner’s prayer and walking the aisle were what a person did to be saved, and I did neither at that camp.
But in 2005, while getting ready for a mission trip to Zimbabwe, God began to convict me in regard to my baptism. I was already pastoring my second church (you can imagine the struggle). But praise God, He won the argument. And the result was not just that I became obedient in baptism, but that I finally understood what true salvation was.
Salvation is not a ceremonial event. It is not about walking an aisle, or signing a card, or swimming in the baptistery, or knowing all the answers. Salvation occurs when God’s Holy Spirit awakens a dead heart, and God Himself grants that sinner faith and draws them to Christ. That night in Abilene God regenerated me, He showed me my sin, He granted me faith, He revealed to me the glorious righteousness that could be found in Christ alone, and He drew me to Himself. He saved me. It had nothing to do with anything religious by modern day standards, but He made me a new person. That is salvation and it looks like a person fully surrendering their life to Jesus Christ. It looks like a person dying to self and taking up the cross and following Jesus. It looks like a person who truly believes. The first 19 years of my life were spent in false belief, and as a result there was no fruit.
But praise God, in 1996 He saved me! He gave me a new nature, He gave me new passions, He gave me His Holy Spirit, and all that I am I owe to Him!
Praise God for His wonderful gift!
